Fan Mail
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From: Ash S. Posted On: 4-19-2005 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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amazing site... the best bit is reading the hate mail... hahahaha i can laugh all day at this stuff
keep up the great work |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Cetagirl Posted On: 1-02-2005 |
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This site is the funniest shit I've seen in a long time. I've added it to my favorites, keep up the good work! |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: mustangdude Posted On: 12-08-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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Best fucking site ever. Me and a few friends just spent all class period sitting around laughing our asses off. Keep up the amazing work. Oh yeah we printed some tickets for some of the fags at school! |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Paul T. Posted On: 12-08-2004 |
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Comments: 1 (Read/Post) |
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The RiceStreet page was dead on. I think a great deal of the "riceboys" are just sadly misinformed. I am from Kansas, and as you might imagine there are few places that can service the demand for the poor whiteguy's unquenchable desire for plastic add-ons and "performance" enhancements. It would appear that Walmart is the choice of the pros with the Kenji style seatcovers, golden dragon license plate frames, and screw on exhaust tips. Yes sadly the NOS steering wheel covers do not add speed to their tic-tac colored cars. That is for those that have a car with one base color. Here in Kansas the popular fad is not finishing your work and rocking the "pasty gray primer" paint job. I was expecting to see a few of these documented on the site, as well as the aluminum or metal spoilers that very well could have come off of an airplane..or bleachers. At any rate you will find it futile to argue that installing these "1337" mods on the cars actually has no effect on its performance since the Riceboy would rather wrap his car around a bridge embankment before accepting that yes, his car is utterly useless. I'll leave with some Rice antics I sadly came into contact with.
1. This took place at a local hotspot for some ricers I guess, which was a street that wasn't even close to a quarter mile. There was a gathering of various second rate early 90's cars here. 2 rocked the partial body kit and metal aerofoil spoiler. The other car was a 92 saturn 4 door. This avid racer stripped his saturn of all its interior...backseat, passenger seat, trim, door panels...you name it. The magnum opus of the night was watching the saturn beat one of the MODDED^3 vehicles. Then again as stated on your site there were 30mph start out speeds to be shared by all.
2. This happened in the parking lot of the driving range where i used to work. Handicapped stalls had parking blocks...these were no more than 5-6 inches off the ground. A honda prelude with ultra groundscraping body kit parks in the handicapped stall. The driver must have realized his only handicap was his blatent stupidity when it comes to cars, so he decided to move to a non handicap spot. After reversing a few feet and wowing all the golfers with a couple revs of his kazoo he pulled diagonally forward. SWEET VICTORY! I watched this clown's front bumper get caught on the parking block, get pulled off and partially run over...I was standing outside and just started cracking up....well..so did most of the people hitting balls. The poor fool so embarrassed put the remains of the bumper in his car as best as he could and drove away....ah....man that was classic.
3. This was a little more personal happening. I do not consider myself a racer by any means. I own a 1993 z28 "camarho". Anyways to the point...I recently moved for school. A friend in my dorm hung out with this apparent riceboy. Well with car talk surfacing it wasn't long before I was being openly challenged. Now...his mitsubishi eclipse came stock with a turbo, and he had made numerous obviously important additions like the metal grating body kit, the rubber band tires on oversized rims, and a spoiler that if properly angled just might have made the car take flight. So one night when headed out it so happened we were lined up at a red light just outside of campus....lets overview. He puts his automatic into neutral so he can rev his engine for everyone around us. I saw him watch the lights so he could
get the necessary RollingRice start. The grand finale he forgets to put it back into drive....and sits reving the engine as it turns green and i take off. Another golden moment in the progression of import racing nation wide. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: AutServSolutions Posted On: 12-08-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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I just wanted to say that thanks for putting on this great website. After reading about it in Mopar Collector's Guide I immediately went online and it made my day. I was starting to think I was the only one who truly hated these so called "tuner cars". I cringe everytime I hear a fart can in the distance. Thanks again and keep up the good work. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Jeremy O. Posted On: 12-08-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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First of all, I must congratulate you. It is a brave holding action you are fighting, trying to stem the tide of consumer-driven mass marketed "culture" that defines most of the "rice boy" scene.
It must also be a thing to live in fear of all the badass homies who threaten to "pop a cap in yaz ass".
The following must be remembered as you read this: I have owned 16 cars, and only one of them was a domestic. Even now, I am rebuilding a 1980 Volvo 242GT.
Modifying inexpensive Japanese cars, if done correctly, is not necessarily a bad thing. In many ways it is similar to the original hot rodding days of the forties and fifties -- taking inexpensive, easy to find cars to individualize, personalize, and increase their performance. But like the "old school" scene, there are always idiots who will think that what they are doing is the end-all-and-be-all of the automotive world and that by slapping on a couple of decals and a wing their ride is now as fast as any car that is performance designed from the outset. In the Fifties it was JC Whitney, now it is APC.
I have some messages for any literate ricers who might read this fan mail:
a.. You Spend $10K on your Civic. It'll make it moderately faster. You might even bring the car's 1/4 time down to 14 seconds or so. And that's on top of the $9k you bought it for.
b.. I Spend 10K on a Mustang. For that price I will have a car that will not only do 11-second 1/4's, but will probably outhandle yours as well. Ever heard of Steeda? Saleen? Oh yeah -- I don't own a Mustang, so that $10k will include having to buy the car!
c.. Find your local SCCA or equivalent. Go to a Solo2 Autocross event. Get your doors blown off by every V8-powered car around a REALLY twisty course. In fact, get your doors blown off by guys in mildly modified Festivas. Then ask them what real performance modification is. About suspension setup, brake balancing and tire choice. About why big wings on street cars are pointless.About why you should NEVER mount a fire extinguisher to the firewall! (Mine's mounted in the passenger footwell). Or really risk your $2k, 500lb bodykit and enter a time-speed-distance rally.
Keep up the good work, Ricecoppers! I have some tickets downloaded, and ready to place... |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Zhang Posted On: 10-18-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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Hi Trooper,
First of all, what a great site you have. I was directed to your site actually via a ticket on my Civic -- it has huge exhaust tip and altezza taillight. But to clarify, I actually got it (used) the way it was from an auction. Funny though, before I actually drove it for a while, I did not even know that it's "riced". I then actually was interested in how cars should be, and looked at sites about cars until I got ticketed by you guys (I'm more a computer geek than car-lover, but I do have "WTF NOOB" plate on it). I browsed your site, and it's quite educating. However, I still love the way my car looks -- it's not outrageously "ricely ugly" but it does look different from all the factory Civic out there.
Keep up the work. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Chris P. Posted On: 10-18-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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Man, your site's awesome! I'm sure you're aware we've got the plague in Australia too.
Is hip-hop/rave culture just making fun of itself? Are people just sick of being cool and rare for a week only for it to become world pop culture the next? That's my theory: Ten years ago "word up" and "yo yo" became too common with caps backwards... so now they're competing with "bling bling" and "fo nizzle my shizzle" because it's silly and daring... It'll never catch on... which again has already made it into prime time adverts. All along with caps at 15 degrees, hanging at the local McDonalds carpark showing off their "sweet rides".
I mean, come on! My mode-of-transport looks better (or sillier) on the OUTSIDE? For fucks sake, it's a car! Most have four wheels and get you where you're going. When I drive my car I'm more interested in how comfortable my arse is and how much I can save on fuel and spend on myself.
I think more people should be awarded for getting around functionally and cost-effectively... That takes intelligence... Save your money for something useful... like an education! (I've read some of your hate mail.)
Top three funniest I've seen...
3. I was up at the local shopping centre one night to see if a store was open... when I drove through the abandoned carpark there's a congregation of ricers. Driving by I noticed that 3, 5, 8, 15, holy shit, all of them were Nissan Skylines. Well, they do say to compare
apples with apples... An orange would be unwelcome.
2. This was more sad than anything... A rice car pulls into the servo and floats across THREE parks. The stupid blonde should invest some money into learning to drive before she spends it on her car. I know I'm more impressed by driving ability. (I mean real ability... not "I can put my foot to the floor and travel in a straight line")
1. I'm trying to get out of a parking lot that's got a couple of those 3-4 inch metal speed bumps. No problem right... But I'm stuck behind some lowered shiny penis with a plastic body kit and skirts all around. He's creeping at about 1/2 a kph trying to get as far to the side as he can, so he only needs to lift two tires. So I overtook him at 30... felt like I ran over a pencil. G-doomp g-doomp.
Tied with this one was a guy I saw the other night who crunched the front of his body kit coming down a steep incline in a parking lot. Hah!
All these body mods that "make your car faster" actually require you to drive slower in every day situations... go figure. Anyway... by the time these little shits are 20, move out of home and get a real job they'll get over it and realise that it's all a waste of time and money and that driving like a dickhead will only lead to trouble... (Hey, I can dream can't I)
Oh, oh... and there was the little hyundai excel... little bubble chick car... it had mass body kit action with a wing that stood about 3 ft high... Notice that they all say you're jealous when you bag em out... If we were jealous we'd compete! But I could go on all day.
Anyway... just thought I'd share that... sorry it's a bit long... keep up the good work. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: Ed F. Posted On: 10-04-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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Trooper,
Though I do not always agree with all the cars you put on your website as being "rice" or ugly, I still enjoy visiting your website and seeing those hideous cars that some of the people around this country drive in. Some of those people bitch you out saying that, "I'm trickin' it out for me, and not for you, (mother this mother that)." If they were indeed doing it for themselves, then why the hell do they email you and bitch you out? You know, it's a matter of taste, if you and the other "officers" out there don't like the cars, then you don't like the cars. No big deal. I just don't see the need for people to write some of the idiotic things that they do to you.. I mean Christ... you just put a pic of their car online and trash
talked it a little bit. They should just nut-up, and take criticism like a man.
Great website, keep up the good work. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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From: 131 Collision Center Posted On: 10-02-2004 |
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Comments: 0 (Read/Post) |
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Hey Rice Cop!
What a killer site!!!! We own a collision shop and see more than our share of cars that need to be on this site. This site will make for great lunch time humor around here! Keep up the great work and thanks for the MANY laughs!!!
Your new fans at 131 Collision Center. |
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Posted by: Trooper |
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